2022. It was still tiring year but less tiring. Still feeling the same mental and emotional baggages from last year but transforming and significantly reduced.
It has been a year of incompletes. I just gave up of executing my plans and go with the flow. The more I see post-it reminders, the more I get irrititated and l feel inclined of not doing them. Some sort of rebellion for myself. Napagod ako sa kakaremind sa sarili ko haha. In other words, na pressure ang lola.
What is the reason? As usual I got busy. I would not say I was busy for the wrong reasons. Napagod lang sa trabaho at gusto ko lang magpahinga after. I just did not commit to most of my personal plans and at some point, it was liberating, got tired of setting some goals for myself. Not the kind of adulting. On a serious note, what could have been improved?
I did not balance the personal aspects of me. I have been meeting the same kind of people. I have been listening to the same concerns. I have known the limitations. I ended up always on the 'left alone side'. I have been doing the same routine. Yes, complaining and being bored and not doing about them have been part of this regular routine.
Ewan ko ba. The least I can do is to take my day a step at a time, which I did. It has made me less vulnerable. It has made me appreciate myself.
What could have been improved?
Too much unnecessary distraction. The feeling of being 'plateaud' is there. Must admit, this year, there are prolonged moments I feel the nonsense. It is not the need to be affirmed. It is the need to be 'at be'. I have not worked out my spirituality. I have not continued my healing. Inwardly, I feel fencesitting. Daming drama to be fair, harhar. But what the fack, eh ganoon nga ang nangyayari.
Anyhows, what do I do...Wala. haha. Paki continue na lang kung ano ang mga nasimulan which will probably feature most of my 2023.
In 2023,
1. Sabi ko magreresign na ako at magiiba ng environment. Pero hindi pa kaya ng security blanket. Not yet ready at emotional and mental aspects. Well, nobody is ready. Pero gusto ko ng mageffort to make ipon in 2023. At least man lang to support my transition. I do not want to feel the pressure. But I need to have the habit. Bahala na si Batman.
2. Travel with dear friends and family. I like to travel with my dear friends and family. Mageeffort ako to organize or to initiate. I promise to reduce my solo travel instead, travel with my friends and family, as a way to reconnect in the long term. Hindi naman kailangan sa malayo. Hindi naman kailangan magastos. But I cannot travel like a begpacker haha. Medyo maarte tayo sa mga travel kineso since I am for convenience and I am a lazy tourist. And not to mention, tita na ho tayo. Huwag na tayong magpanggap. Anyhows, Let's make good memories!
3. Out of Comfort Zone. Sabi ko sa frenny ko, ito ang unkabogable theme for next year. Naisip ko lang siya random. Self explanatory naman siya. Out of Comfort Zone? ano ba concept nito, ito ba ay mga bungee jumping levels? Lol. Of course not. Ikoconnect ko siya sa adulting version 3.0. Gosh, ang tanda, haha. I wont make too many plans dahil itutuloy lang natin. Mag cacatch up lang tayo at sawa na tayo sa kakaplano. Now that's my out of comfort zone. Expect failures, success and breaking box office records.
4. Declutter and no waste. Dami kong waste this year. Food waste to be exact. Waste of time. Waste of brain cells because of procrastination. Sabi ko kung hindi naman ako makakaipon, at least i won't waste stuff. Let's go circular. Reuse, recycle and stop the food waste. And let's be genuinely productive. Paka green tayo this 2023, less carbon.
Yes, 2022. Thank you for all the love. 2023, I will love you more.
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