2021 Part 2

And just like that. 2021 just flew by. And I still have not travelled outside Korea. It is the longest time I got stuck here. The farthest that I can travel is Jeju, which does not entice me enough. Why? I do not know, not a fan of too much nature. Volcanoes, beaches, forests? To enjoy Jeju, you have to rent a car because tourist spots are far from each other. Crossing fingers we all get to travel in 2022. More than travel, I hope to come home. Just being there, with my presence, feeling the vibes. Catching up with my family and friends in person. 

And just like that I fully paid my debt. The first month I had debt free, I felt so celebrating but only to be scammed with my extra money. haha. Anyhows, more than the scam and money, what to do? 2022 is more of financial rest. Live within the means and share some blessings. That's the mantra. Believe me bisyo ko lang is kumain ng masarap at bumili ng libro (which is different from basahin ang libro, char). It even takes me months to buy some clothes. 

And just like that I signed another contract. It felt liberating because I do not need to worry about renewing contracts over and over again. The big BUT is it won't stop me from looking for other prospects. Must recognize that my mission in my current office is almost done. Hindi naman natatapos ang trabaho. I think what's keeping me is I am still learning. And the whole world is your stage. I still get challenged. It is a rare opportunity to make a difference. But I need to decide and work it out for me. 

And just like that, another year. Balikan ko na lang notes ko later this week for other highlights. I am grateful that me and all my loved ones have managed to stay healthy and safe despite pandemic. Pandemic has exposed all the inequalities in the society. There are different ways of coping about pandemic. Some even totally deny it. Others risk themselves. And those who manage the risks well have the means to do it anyway. Overall, you put faith and action into your every day life and somehow that's enough. And be kind always. 

2021 is the year that I did miss myself, for whatever's worth. I miss the feeling of novelty. I miss the challenges. I miss having focus. I miss looking forward to what is there in between work. I miss the warmth of friendship. I miss little things like organizing, cleaning. I miss good sex. I miss myself expressing my gayness. I miss myself showing myself out there. I miss having fun. I miss all my first loves and first loves never die.  And 2021 is also the year that I started doing something with what have I been missing. I did brave myself exploring. I did meet new friends. God knows I tried harder to have focus. I faced my own demons and befriended my anxiety. A step at a time to going back to my first loves, because that makes me who I am. Just like that.