Barely a month after akong nakauwi from my overseas work, feeling ko all of a sudden ang dami kong time. I mean nawala yung routine ko at na didisrupt ang 'life systems' ko. Char. At medyo nabobore ako kahit alam kong puwede naman akong maging productive. At feeling ko naman productive din naman ko pero iba pa rin.
I know this is what they call transition or adjustment. And I feel the fatigue. I feel the uncertainty it brings. To be fair, hindi naman ako nawala ng matagal and believe me, hindi naman ako nawala as in hindi nagpakita. Just imagine siguro yung iba na nawala ng matagal talaga tapos bumalik and what do they do and how do they feel when they begin again.
Anyhow I am still adjusting to this new lifestyle. I find it flexible and you feel empowered kase you have all the time at your disposal. There is a promise to this. Siyempre you get tired, physically and mentally and you feel like a lone ranger. Ewan. Carry naman. Enjoy while supply lasts ika nga.
37 na ako two days ago. My gahd. Medyo nawala sa feels ko ang magmoment. I miss the days na I wish I could be more ethusiastic when celebrating life's milestones. I'd rather retreat to a nice beach, zen feels and waves, with pinacolada (char) and perhaps talk to nice random strangers.
But I am genuinely feeling fine. That is the better part. Never been more resolved. Well for one I'd wish this year Universe would be a bit more generous.